In anticipation of the Barnsley by-election contest, after the seat was suddenly vacated by the latest in a long line of crooks, Euroslime Dave has asked Darren Gough, the former England cricketer, to stand for the Conservatives. Apparently, Euroslime made a personal telephone call to the man, who quite sensibly thought it was a prank and hung up. A hapless Tory MP had to call Gough back and tell him it was the real thing.
However, the former Yorkshire and England cricket sat star, and the man who won TV's Strictly Come Dancing in 2005, finds that he has too many commitments for him to waste his life being a Tory MP - not that he would actually get elected. A donkey with a red rosette would stand a better chance in Barnsley - although one understands that there aren't too many donkeys willing to stand either.